Hi class!! Let's work with the movie we are watching in class, which I hope you're enjoying as much as I am!
About Rose's lecture on love:
* Do you think we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love? If you think we are, which are those conditions culture imposes on us?
* Do you believe the idea we have of romantic love manipulates our decisions concerning love and the ideal partner?
Please, answer the questions. You can also include comments on what other classmates have written.
Remember you have to post two questions about the lecture and answer questions someone else has asked.
Enjoy the activity! It involves thinking and writing about our beliefs.
*Do you think we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love? If you think we are, which are those conditions culture imposes on us?
ResponderEliminarWell, about the first question, I think we are not. The word “culture” is defined as what men do, but every culture has its own codes, rules, beliefs and a particular viewpoint of the world. So, to be or not to be in love, or get marry, depends on each culture. Of course we expect other people to fall in love, because it is really nice and “fucking great”, but I reckon we do not pressure them to do it. I mean, some cultures have a tendency to impose certain conditions on people, others don’t. That’s why I think we are not culturally preconditioned.
* Do you believe the idea we have of romantic love manipulates our decisions concerning love and the ideal partner?
About this last question, I do believe it and I don’t. On one hand, if we know what kind of person we want by our side, the idea of romantic love will manipulate our decisions. Everything has to do with the characteristics or appearance of that special person, what make us look for this kind of people and not other. Because we are sure we will fall in love with the person we dream about and so we follow the idea we have of THAT human being, with those characteristic and that particular personality, and we do not tend to look for the opposite. But on the other hand, our heart can make a sudden change. Maybe we find the “dream person” but actually he/she doesn’t fulfill our expectations and so the idea of romantic love is useless. Perhaps we end up with falling in love with a person we never imagined to have a relationship with, but in love, what rules is the heart, not the mind.
These are my questions…
1) Do you agree with me when I said: “in love, what rules is the heart, not the mind”?
2) Why do you think it feels “fucking great” to fall in love?
3) I don’t think we fall in love just for the propagation of the species. What’s your opinion?
I hope you enjoy the activity!!!! See you soon!!!
Tomorrow I’ll be 20!!!! Jaja.
Hello class! Let’s talk a little bit about love. I have some questions for some of you and I am interested in reading what are you going to write.
ResponderEliminarAs we know, every day in movies or in soap operas we can see couples saying to each other “I will love you forever” and what is more, last class in literature we read about a Scottish man who will love his women until seas go dry. So, taking this into consideration, my first question is: do you think that love is forever? And what happen to couples that are lots of years together, do you believe they love each other or they are just accustomed to be with the other person?
Another interesting point is adolescent love. What is your opinion towards teenagers and their emotions when they are in love? Do you agree with the idea that their feelings are part of a biological stage and they are not real? Or do you think that they have a true love with spiritual dimensions?
Well, I’m looking forward to read your answers, Hugs!
Hi Flori!!! Your questions are very interesting. First of all, I do believe love can last forever. I’m very much in love with my boyfriend and I think I will love him forever, because it is not only what we feel for each other but also the moments we shared and the things we do to make our love stronger. It may happen in some couples, which I know, that are accustomed to be with the other person. Personally, I will try to avoid this situation because is really painful. And about teenager love, I fell in love when I was 17 and my boyfriend 19, so we were both teenagers. I reckon feelings have nothing to do with age but with what you feel and experience when you are with that special person.
ResponderEliminarHope you like it!!!
Bye bye…
hello class!how are you doing?what a topic this time:love!let´s see what I can say about it.concerning the first question,I would say that we are not culturally preconditioned to fall in love.We fall in love because it is something human,because we need it,as a boy in the movie said:"we need to connect our souls with somebody".It is true the fact that we are part of a culture but it does not mean that our culture imposes on us certain decisions about love, at least not in our culture.
ResponderEliminarOn the other hand,the idea of romantic love can influence on our behaviour,our desire to look for the "perfect couple".But when we get to know the other person better, we are in condition of choosing wether or not to stay with that person,share our goals,looking for support,respect each other and all the things living with a partner involve.That is when the idea of romantic love becomes useless or not.
I have two questions for you about the passage that we had to fill in the gaps in class,remember?what is the meaning of "reality is shattered"? and,what does she mention Casablanca,Turrendo or La Boheme?Does it have something to do with love?
Hi Loly,and first of all,HAPPY BIRTHDAY!I hope you are enjoying yourself!let,s talk now about your questions.I don´t think we fall in love for the propagation of the species.Does it mean to have children right?One thing is to start a relationship of boyfriend and girlfriend,another completely different thing is to get married and to take the decision to have children and all the implications that it involve(bring them up,being able to afford their needs...).Not all couples decide to have children but they do decide to support each other if they are really in love
ResponderEliminarHello class! These are my answers:
ResponderEliminarI don’t go along with the idea that we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love. From my point of view, human beings do so because it is an inherent condition. It is in our essence, in our soul because love is the engine that moves our life every day; it is what keeps us going! No matter to which culture you belong to or where you were born, everybody falls in love at least once in life.
As far as the second question is concerned, I believe the answer is yes. The idea we have of romantic love manipulates our decisions because we tend to be in love with or to look for someone who has the characteristics of what we consider our ideal partner. In addition, I agree with Loli when she says we fall in love with the person we dream. However, this is not always true. Sometimes we meet someone who has nothing to do with our ideal person. In fact, many times that perfect boyfriend or girlfriend is utopian because it doesn’t exist. To sum up, I can say that up to a point I agree with the point of the question but I also think that it is not always true.
Hi everybody! Considering the question if we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love, I agree with the girls. Even if we are looking for cultural stereotypes, it doesn’t mean that we will end by falling in love with someone like this. Culture may condition our behaviour, our beliefs, our ways of living, and even our relationships with others. But, as Loly said before, our feelings are ruled by the heart and not by the head.
ResponderEliminarFlor, you’ve mentioned a phrase of the poem “My Love” by Bobbie Burns. When I read it for the first time, I loved it. But then, Paola made me realise the real connotation of it (that he expected her to wait patiently for him, knitting in her home, while he was living an adventure), I felt very disappointed. I think that if he was saying goodbye telling her “I will love you until the seas go dry”, it doesn’t make sense.
My questions are: Don’t you thing that in relationships the support, the sympathy and the understanding are very important?
In the movie “The Mirror has Two Faces”, Greg is looking for a “rational” relationship. Do you think that love can be so much rational? Can love be so serious?
Hello everyone!! I like your ideas about love, girls. I believe in love and I know it lasts forever because when I look at my parents I see love in their eyes. How they gaze at each others eyes, it's just wonderful. After 36 years they are still together and their love grows stronger everyday.I feel very strongly that love is not only having things in common or sharing interests, it is also looking at your partner and inmediately understands how he/she feels. That's why I think that falling in love makes people feel " FUCKING GREAT"
ResponderEliminarTaking Loly's first question into consideration, I have no doubts that love is ruled by our hearts. Sometimes we do have fears when we fall in love and we try to convince ourselves that we are not in love with someone. " It's just a friend" that's what we normally say and we know deep down that we love him or her because our heart says so. This happen due to the fact that human beings don't want to get hurt or dissapointed by commiting to someone. So, I have a desire to give you the following piece of advice. Before mading up your mind, you should remember that IF YOU DON'T TAKE ANY RISKS, YOU WILL NEVER WIN.
LOLY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! So stupid of me to forget this before. Anyway I hope you have an awesome day.
ResponderEliminarNow let's continue talking a little bit about love. I go along with Loly. To my mind, tennagers love exists. I have a friend who is 24 now and she has been with her boyfriend since they were 16. When I was a teenager, love was sharing moments of happinnes. it was like feeling butterflies flying inside my stomach when I listened to my boyfriend and it was being with the other person all the time.
However, as time passed by, love is commiting to each other, understanding the other person and accepting not only their virtues but also their faults.
I completely agree with you Loly. If we fell in love because of the propagation of species we should be animals! I don't know if you agree with me. but that's what I think.
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ResponderEliminar-Do you think we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love? If you think we are, which are those conditions culture imposes on us?
ResponderEliminarIt was really difficult for me to think an answer for this question..
Yesterday I was at my grandma’s house, and she said to her friend “oh, she is 50 and is single, poor woman”. So, some questions came up to my mind: Is it wrong to be fifty and single at the same time? Is that woman unhappy? After thinking abut it, I realized that it is not a sin to be single, and perhaps that “poor” woman is happier than other one who is married, but anyway, finding a “special person” seems to be very important for society. So, in a way I agree with the idea that we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love, I mean, is what our culture has imposed on us.
But is not the same “to be preconditioned to fall in love” and “to actually BE in love”. I can say that people fall in love because it is in our nature, and it is human, no matter which culture we belong to. Anyway, we have to be conscious of the fact that, unfortunately, there are some cases in which people do not find their soul-mate.
-Do you believe the idea we have of romantic love manipulates our decisions concerning love and the ideal partner?
I don’t think that the idea of “romantic love” manipulates our decisions concerning love and the ideal partner. In fact, I consider that it is just the opposit. I would say that we “create” our own idea of romantic love once we have found that special person. So, according to our partner’s characteristics and to the things that make that person SPECIAL, we build the idea of “romantic love”. That is why, I think that the term for that idea has to do with each person’experience,because as Loly says, what rules, is the heart, and not the idea that we have on our minds..
My questions concerning the dialogue are:
- Can a person be happy without being in love?
- Can a person fall in love more than once?
I decided to answer Loly’s questions:
ResponderEliminar1) Do you agree with me when I said: “in love, what rules is the heart, not the mind”?
At first I thought that this statment was completely true. But after thinking about that, I came up with a conclusion: of course the heart is what really matters, but anyway there are cases in which mind is important. You can love someone but if the other person does not feel the same, I guess it is time to think with the head. It would be useless to be with a person who does not share the same love as you, because you will be hurt. It is not nice to say this but there are situations in which we have to put our hearts apart.
2) Why do you think it feels “fucking great” to fall in love?
I guess that the nice thing of being in love is to feel that you have someone who supports you in an inconditional way. Besides, as Rose says in the movie, it is wondedrful to have a person by your side who knows every tiny and unimportant thing about you, because that shows that he/she really cares about you and your things.
3) I don’t think we fall in love just for the propagation of the species. What’s your opinion?
I couldn’t agree more. Of course that is not the main reason. (Although I don’t think that people think about a reason to fall in love, I mean, it just happens) I guess that the most important reason is that, as I say before, it is nice to share your things with someone, no matter how silly they are. As well, It is nice to feel that you are important for someone, and as a friend of mine says “it is terific to have that feeling of butterflies on your belly”
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ResponderEliminarNow, Liliana's questions.... I love doing this exercise. I'm having so much fun this year...
ResponderEliminarWell, on one hand we are culturally preconditioned to fall in love. Since human beings are really young, other people tell them that without love there is no life. That's why every person want to fall in love and find their soul mate. For instance, when I watched "He's just not that into you", I was influenced by what it is to be into someone. What I mean here is that we sometimes make our minds up if this is love or not taking into account what happen in movies. On the other hand, we have the need to fall in love, to feel that somebody cares about us. It seems to me that life is incomplete without love. EVERY HUMAN BEING WANTS TO FEEL PASSION AND ROMANTIC LOVE.
According to what I said before, I would say that we are influenced by what we listen to in love songs, read in romantic novels and watch in soup operas. We have a desire to be part of that kind of love too. We want to be part of a ROMANTIC LOVE.
This are my questions:
1) Do you think that love is a vital part of life? Justify your answer.
2) Which are the things that make a relationship work?
3)Do you think that when we fall in love, we are able to give our life for the other person's life?
I hope you like my questions. I'm really looking forward to reading your answers.
Hi guys!!!! Isn´t it a fantastic topic to deal with because each of us has his/her own ideas!They may be similar or really contrasting but they ´re all deep thoughts!
ResponderEliminarPersonally speaking I would say that we are culturally preconditioned in certain ways. During our infancy we are used to seeing soup operas and movies that tell us a lot about being in love and being with a partner for the rest of our lives. Those shows don´t tell us about the truth of sharing everyday activities for some years, as Rose said “because there is no after” And there are times in which parents tend to impose the idea on their kids that they have to study, have a degree, get a job and marry and have a family. Fortunatelly, nowadays, young people think a lot about the future and they are really concerned about their lives. This is really great because till adulthood they are mature enough to choose the way their lives should be and the future for them and if they want to have a family of their own.
As we have said in class Love at the beginning is blind, so the person in love tends to make decisions which he is not fully aware of. But the truth is that this kind of love is an illusion, it´s not real. After a while the person becomes aware of his feelings and realizes that he has to think once and again to make choices concerning himself and his partner. I really think that after some years love is not the same. The worst enemies are monotony and routine, and to be still living a romantic love you need to have very clear and strong feelings. It´s not easy to keep the candles lit for many many years.
As regards Valentina´s question about being happy without being in love, my opinion is that each of us has to be mature enough to be able to be alone. It´s quite hard to gather strength and stay alone. Society leads us to be with a partner. But it´s not always easy to find the right person, after some time you are so use to being alone that you are happy with the way your life is. It´s at that point that a partner would shattered yor everyday life.
Concerning Cinthy´s second quesion, I should say that mutual understanding, respect and support with some pieces of advice at the right time are the key to make a relationship go on working since the beginning till many many years after they first met. It´s also very important that the couple talk a lot about their everyday situations and decisions.
These are the questions that I´ve thought:
1- Which other feelings and emotions would you treasure for the rest of your lives?
2- What other emotions or situations can make your everyday reality being shattered besides love?
3- I´ve been thinking of the expression “short shelf life” and I can´t find many more uses, except for the situation of a 45 young lady whose biological clock doesn´t allow her much time to get pregnant... so if she´s longing to become mother this is a very short shelf life situation.
Ok, I´ve really enjoyed this experience, and I want to read lot more ideas about this topic!
Before I forget Better late than never: hAPPY BIRTHDAY LOLY!!!!
See U soon!!!
Hello girls and boy! What an interesting topic!
ResponderEliminarAccording to the first question, I think that, on one hand, love is something that shouldn´t be imposed in our hearts by anyone because love belongs to our nature, love is proper to human beings; as the most of us said before. So, culture doesn´t has to do with the fact of falling in love, it depends on each person. Having said this I started thinking about a long time ago, when parents used to choose the husband they liked for their daughters. What a disgusting situation! Don´t you think?
On the other hand, I go along with Vale, because in some way, our society expects us to marry, to have children, a house, and a dog in the big garden. So, in other words, we are a bit preconditioned to fall in love because of that ideal of the “perfect family”, but luckily, it is changing with globalization: now it´s more acceptable to live the way you most like; this idea wasn´t even thought in the 50s for example.
Taking into consideration the second question I believe that our idea of romantic love, in certain point, manipulates our decisions concerning love and the ideal partner: we tend to look for a person to share our life who will fulfill the parameters that we have in mind, this special person should be the perfect ideal of a lover. Nevertheless, sometimes it is not in that way: although we think that our boyfriend or girlfriend is perfect (we tend to think this when we are in love at the beginning of a relationship), then when we really know that person, we realize that she/he is not so perfect, but is a person like anyone, who has their strengths and weaknesses. So, this person can be just the opposite of what we were looking for, but we can change our idea of romantic love. Why not?
The two questions are:
1) It´s said that love is blind… what do you think about that?
2) What´s your opinion about the fact that nowadays less couples marry?
hey there! here are the answers to some of the questions above:
ResponderEliminar- Can a person be happy without being in love?
I totally think this is possible since I know a lot of single women that are happy with their lives. I believe it all depends on the person because there are some people who see the fact of being single as misery and loneliness and, because of this, would rather marry any guy than being alone the rest of their lives. On the contrary, there are some clever people who dont care about being single because their definition of "happiness" is different. They believe they can be as happy as any other person by trusting someone else rather than a partner, for example, their family and friends.
1) It´s said that love is blind… what do you think about that?
I think it's true because when you love someone you just don't care the cost of being with him/her. I mean, you don't care what other people say, his/ her flaws, the either good or bad influence he/she has on you, etc. The only thing you wanna do is being with him/her and make him/her happy, no matter what it takes. That's why I support the idea that a person in love is blind.
My questions are:
Do you believe in love at first sight?
Does phisical attraction have something to do with love?
Hello class! This time I´m going to answer Sofi´s questions: Do you believe in love at first sight? Does physical attraction have something to do with love?
ResponderEliminarTaking into consideration the first one, in what represents real love, I don´t think that the first time you see a person you fall in love with he/she. You can feel attraction for that person, but with the passing of time you will feel love, when you get to know that person better. That´s my opinion, but what doesn´t mean that no one will feel love at first sight. (I said this because it has never happened to me).
According to the second question, physical attraction is the first thing that you see in other person; so, if you want to know a person in order to have a relationship, the first thing you see has to like you; so, in a way the physics has something to do with love, it is the first step. It´s said that everything enters for the eyes, don´t you think?
Hi again!
ResponderEliminarI’m going to answer Cintia’s question that is the following one:
Which are the things that make a relationship work?
Personally, I can say a lot of things that can make a couple work but I must admit that to put those things into practice is something a bit difficult. However, I will try to mention them. Firstly, couples should be nice and pleasant to each other and they should learn how to share the little things of life. Secondly, they have to listen to each other because it is the only way people have to solve their problems and differences. Finally, couples should not be excessively jealous and should trust more in their partner.
And this is my second answer to this question: Can a person be happy without being in love?
From my point of view a person can be happy without being in love but can’t be happy without the love of a family. I think that a person may have a lot of boyfriends or girlfriends but there is only one family and it never change. In my opinion that’s real love.
Wow!!! I was so pleased by your participation and your well thought answers. Congrats to everyone! You got me hooked, reading about all your different ideas and points of view on love. It is definitely, the KEY to a happy existence, whether it is realized in the form of a loving family, a nice partner, passion for your profession, caring friends.... you name it. The truth is, we all need LOVE in our lives, in its different ways!
ResponderEliminarKeep writing! This is a great way to get to know each other.